You May be a Secular Liberal

1 - If you believe that having black children adopted by white families may not be a good idea because the children will grow up in an incongruous situation that could cause problems in later life, but believe those who oppose the adoption of children by two men united by an addiction to sodomy are bigots.
You may be a secular liberal

2 - If you routinely assert that most people who disagree with you are bigots, yet equally regularly affirm that one should not be judgemental.
You may be a secular liberal

3 - If you believe that, asserting that anyone who holds that sodomy is unnatural, unhealthy or immoral, must be secretly suppressing similar secret proclivities themselves, constitutes a rational argument.
You may be a secular liberal

4 - If you believe that we should discourage children from smoking because it is unhealthy, but that we should not discourage children from adopting a homosexual death style notwithstanding the death toll from AIDs is 30,000,000 and still counting.
You may be a secular liberal

5 - If you believe the indiscriminate killing of innocent Jews by Hitler was an horrendous crime, but support the indiscriminate killing of innocent children in the womb by abortion.
You may be a secular liberal

6 - If you believe that a religion that was founded by a war lord and which has spent the last fourteen centuries expanding by conquest, which has also been in a permanent state of bloody civil war since its inception, and which provides some ninety per cent of the world's terrorists, is a religion of peace.
You may be a secular liberal

7 - If you believe that we must encourage widespread use of artificial contraception to avoid demographic disaster, but should also import millions of immigrants to keep our economy growing.
You may be a secular liberal

8 - If you believe that a white man who votes for a white presidential candidate because he is white, is a racist bigot, but a black man who votes for a black candidate just because he is black is a fine, decent, upright fellow.
You may be a secular liberal

9 - If you believe that the climate started to change in your lifetime.
You may be a secular liberal

11 - If you are aware of the fact that over ninety per cent of the victims of clerical sex abuse by Catholic priests are adolescent males, and you still believe the Church has a problem with paedophile priests.
You may be a secular liberal

12 - If you believe that a sexual pathology (homosexuality) that has given us over fifty per cent of the world's serial killers, nearly eighty percent of convicted child molesters, almost the entire officer core of the Nazi Storm Troopers and some twenty percent of the Nazi death camps most sadistic guards, is merely a harmless "orientation".
You may be a secular liberal

13 - If you believe that the 700 woman who every day in the UK have their child murdered by abortion suffer no lasting psychological negative effects, but believe the odd one or two who put their baby up for adoption must suffer life long regret.
You may be a secular liberal

14 - If you believe that governments can define what marriage is, but cannot define what cabbages or grass are.
You may be a secular liberal

15 - If you believe that Obama is right to exploit the tragic killing of Trayvon Martin by George Zimmerman (a man acquitted of his murder by a jury, which perversely failed to do its duty to ignore the evidence) to serve his own agenda, while completely ignoring the fact that in the decade between 2000 to 2010 blacks have killed 65,000 white Americans in the course of committing a crime.
You may be a secular liberal

16 - If you believe that executing a cold-blooded killer by lethal injection is a cruel and unusual punishment that should be banned, but support the right-to-die campaign for the elderly to be killed by lethal injections.  You may be a secular liberal.

If you find that having any of the square circles that comprise the doctrines of your secular "religion" pointed out to you makes you angry and start calling people names like "homophobic", "bigot", "judgemental," etc., rather than prompting you to re-evaluate your position, you're definitely a secular liberal - but don't worry about it, just settle down to enjoying life in the asylum - at least you'll have plenty of company, all those who get their religion from the BBC for starters.