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Tuesday, 28 April 2015

Dear Churchmen, do not worry ...

[I stumbled on this blog post.  It is a spoof letter to the clergy from a layman.  It is absolutely spot on.  Unfortunately, I could not ascertain the blog author's name, so I cannot properly pay tribute to the author, however, by hitting the "GO TO ORIGINAL BLOG" button at the bottom, you will be taken to his or her blog - ed]

The stench of sodomy is destroying the Church from the lowest pew to the Vatican.  Countless souls are going to hell because of this vice, a vice so awful that even the Devil, having tempted men into committing this mortal sin, looks away in disgust.  Unless these poor, wretched souls confess and receive absolution and amend their lives they will be eternally damned.

There, Your Excellencies, Your Holinessses, Reverend Fathers, we've said it now so you don't have to.  Now you can go back to what you were doing and not have to worry any longer about preaching against this vice. You can continue with your photo-ops, your meetings with the high and the mighty, you can revel in all the good press you will receive from the media and sodomite-friendly presidents, and you don't need to be bothered with telling anyone they are living in a state of mortal sin.

We'll do that for you.  We laymen, writers, bloggers, people in the pew...we'll relieve you of your duty to teach since you apparently aren't terribly interested in doing so.  Don't preach sermons telling Catholics that contraception, abortion and sodomy are destroying souls and destroying countries. That's not your job.  Your job is to train altar girls and make sure we're all participating at what you call a Mass and things like that.

We'll take the hits, the lawsuits, the persecutions, the destruction of our livelihoods (perhaps even our lives, I guess) the opprobrium of the media and everyone else.  We bakers and photographers will see our businesses ruined, our reputations torn to shreds, our bank accounts disappear simply for the pleasure of relieving you of the burden to teach faith and morals.  And you don't even have to visit us in jail if you don't want to.

We'll watch our own churches shun us, or former Catholic friends abandon us and our pastors studiously ignore us.  We accept this because we know you don't wish to get your hands dirty by teaching the Faith. You can continue to golf, go to the movies, sit on your thrones, smell your sheep, get interviewed on TV, receive the goodwill of impostors, heretics, blasphemers and haters of Christ.  Don't worry; we'll do your fighting for you.

You have more important things to do.  You have to scurry to Rome and share a glass of wine with the cowards who connive with our oppressors.  You have to worry about the environment, about not saying anything Christ-like that might offend rabbis or Hindus (Heaven forbid that you try to convert them!), There are meetings with Happy Clubs and Happy Organizations you must address.  You must extol diversity and Welcoming.  This is what you must do.

So please don't trouble yourselves about having anything to do with Catholicism.  Continue to sit on your collective rumps and enjoy the cheers of the crowd.

Because, as I said, I guess we'll have to do your job for you.

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